Thursday, February 16

What to Do?

I am back on track, yet you may have noticed the lack of a Wednesday Weighin title. I am in the middle of trying to decide whether WW is working for me or whether I am just plodding along week after week, paying my money and getting annoyed at everything. I am in the limbo stage at the moment. I have joined, left and re-joined a number of times but I just feel I am not getting anything out of it at the moment. That being said, I am completely back on track. Have been eating well and drinking heaps of water. Have not been snacking at all, which is bloody excellent for me.

We are moving again. Mum and Dad are offering us their rental which has more room for the kids rooms. And... it is 200m, if that, from a really large park - Jellie Park which has a Swimming complex and a gym and plenty of walking areas. It would only be temporary until they sell and move to the country where they are building their dream home. They have offered to buy us a house and set the ball rolling there. The house would be Rangiora way so that they could still look after the kids (as they are my childcare)and it will all work out brilliantly. Unless .... Blair gets into the fire service and gets his second choice on location and ends up in Wellington.

Who knows but the rental part goes ahead in 3 weeks anyway.
Posted by Jules :: 1:10 pm :: 18 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------------------------------

Saturday, February 11

The Sperminator

Warning: Sperm and bad language ahead!!

When you cum with Sperm@m@x nothing else matters.
With Spermamax one towel won’t be enough to wipe off your sperm.
Spermamax improves your sperm motility.

Okay, WTF? I am sick to death of losers, who can't get a real job, sending me emails with the above content. For starters, who the hell wants to deal with the washing of two or more towels every time you have nooky? Not me!! You have too much spare time on your hands if you are after that sort of clean up job. Point being -LEAVE ME ALONE SPAMMER LOSERS.

Now for the interesting part of the post:

Being one of the 'biggest losers' myself, I have to admit to one and all that I did not end up biking while watching TV. No, I ate dinner instead. Why, because I didn't get home until half and hour before programme, whipped family up dinner while the man sat on his anus trying to download some music and, just as I served up said dinner, said anus sitter-onner had my brother turn up, impromptu apparently, and they departed for the pub. The joy of being a woman.

I have made a decision, one of many: I am going to blog on Wednesday and Saturday - definitely! Any other blogging will be done on a "casual" basis and you will be priviledged beyond belief to have more than two entries a week from the famous MOI!! Reason: as many have said before me, it just gets too time consuming and I need to live it as much as I write it.

Now for a wee tidbit into the brain workings of the fab JULES:

I find it amazing that one little kilo has made my self-perception go mad. I feel huge, bigger than I have ever felt. I am really being hard on myself, I look at myself in the mirror and cringe at the sheer volume of space that my face takes up. I mean, there is only so much room in the universe and clearly, by being obese I am doubling my allocated quota. I don't know whether I am retaining an abnormal amount of fluid at the moment but I feel like the Staypuff Marshmallow Man. Where's Bill Murray when you need him?

Plan of Attack:

Drink heaps of water
Cut down on salt
No sugar in coffee

Baby steps aye?

Posted by Jules :: 9:19 am :: 10 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------------------------------

Thursday, February 9

My Second Arse

Week 4 of Paulene's challenge

24th weighin at weight watchers.

Start Weight: 109.8kg
Current Weight: 103.6kg
Loss/Gain: +100g
Kgs Lost: 6.2kg
Kgs to Goal: 38.6kg

So ridiculously, the inch worm is creeping it's way back up the scale. I got a wee bit silly about it for about a second, then thought, in reality - I have put on one whole kg since before Christmas. I am not really blowing out as such, but rather stagnating.

Am hopping on the bike tonight while The Biggest Loser is on. I don't want to ever watch another 'fat' programme again without doing something active at the time.

Now, here is a disturbing fact that I was made aware of by my reflection this morning. I have two arses!! No shit, I have the normal, yet rather large one that resides at the base of my spine. Okay. But, I have discovered a second one. It has probably been there for a while but I have just not had the chance to view it before now. I was ironing my work trousers this morning while wearing my bra and "pull your tummy in, creating a muffin top" knickers. I reached up, above the microwave to grab some obscure item out of the cupboard. I happened to glance at the microwave door and lo-and-behold, there it was. Blinding me with it's hideousness was my second arse. The reflection was of the top of my inner thighs, just below the panty line, or otherwise to be referred to as Arse 2. The squidgy fat that lolls around at the top of my thighs has formed a nice little arse (the type of arse I wouldn't be too pissed off about having at the back where the rather bulbous one is situated right now).

So, this leads to a new challenge in the list of many challenges:

The "BANISH THE SECOND ARSE, ONE IS ENOUGH" Challenge.

Posted by Jules :: 3:13 pm :: 9 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------------------------------

Sunday, February 5

My Apologies

I received a comment in response to my self pitied whine about "where are you all and where are your comments?" post and I must admit, it made me feel horrible. Not horrible that it was posted, but horrible that the person feels the way that they do. So that you know what I am talking about - here is the comment:

I have commented on your blog a few times and, due to lack of response, have given up. You get out what you put in rings true on many levels.

Not holding this against you, I will probably be back, but I found I can't help but feel badly when I don't get comments, esp from people on whose blogs I comment. As you know, losing weight and making over my life is hard enough without worrying about things like comments received - comments are supposed to be a source of strength and encouragement and that's now the only way I look at them. So, like Mary, I have taken to only leaving comments for people who do the same to me.

Good luck with your new plan, I am sure you will get out of it what you put in. You can do it!!

As you can read - the comment is not nasty in any way, shape or form but I feel quite horrible in the fact that I have been taken to task on something that I feel quite strongly about. I love to receive comments from each and every one of you and I try, as often as possible, to get back and read what is going on in your lives as well. I work fulltime, have three children and fit in posting and reading when I can. I comment as often as I feel I have anything worth saying. Sometimes I have things to say but only have a few minutes to read and not comment. And, lazily - I tend to comment on the same old regulars and only comment on others on odd occassions. The purpose of this is not to excuse myself at all. The purpose is to send a heartfelt apology to the person who left this comment. I know exactly how you feel, as there is a well known blogger out there, who I won't name, who I go check up on regularly as I admire her guts and determination. I used to leave comments a lot, now I only leave them every now and then - as this person has done the same thing to me as I have done to the Anonymous commenter. They have not once left a comment on my blog nor responded to my comments on their own blog. It has hurt my feelings a wee bit but, I have moved on and I still read her blog.

My point, if there really is one - is that I have gone and visited every single blog of every single person who has commented on my site, but I have not commented on every single one. I apologise for hurt feelings and, as I don't know who you are, I wish you all the best on your journey as well. We are all here for each other but, the main objective for me in doing this is to get out feelings, frustrations and day to day struggles that I can't get out in any other medium. This blog is for me and anyone else who gains strength, laughter or information from it. But - selfishly I put me above all else when it comes to blog land. Good luck to one and all and please believe me when I say I gain immense inspiration from each and every person out there who puts there heart on the line by blogging and letting even one stranger in to the space that is their weightloss struggle.

Posted by Jules :: 6:14 pm :: 17 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------------------------------

Thursday, February 2

A New Approach

Hey guys, thanks for all your comments. I have taken each and every one on board, and once you all pointed out how busy we all are - I remembered that I have posted stuff all comments myself since just before Christmas. Have put everything in perspective. Leigh - you got me thinking, I am rather large to be expecting to run without consequences. It is about getting to a more comfortable level to be able to tackle the running. I have a new idea - when don't I? I am going to start the Couch to 5K again when I hit my 10%. At 103.5kg, I still have around 5kg to go. Time to concentrate on the food. I have set a limit on the breastfeeding issue. Yes, I am still breastfeeding the squirt. Morning and night. It is a wee bond that we have and I am finding it extremely hard to break. I gave up with Peta and Ben when they were both about to hit 7 - 8 months. Yet Phoebs is 10 months old on Monday and I find it very distressing to think that this will be the last child I will nuture in such a way. All the material I read on the weight subject indicates that the body will not let you lose too much weight while you are breastfeeding - it just goes against the natural scheme of things. Your hormones are constantly gearing you to look after the baby so it screams at you not to lose weight or you won't be able to look after your bubba.

I am going to approach this in a more sensible manner from now on. I am not Oprah Winfrey - I don't have a personal trainer to get me through daily vigorous training sessions and a chef to cook up nutritious low fat meals.

Slowly, steadily and surely. As long as we are going down and not up aye?

On a different tangent, watch a bit of The Biggest Loser tonight. Some of those women look so big, yet when they got on the scales they were around the same weight as me and sometimes a little smaller. This concerns me on many levels but the most important being: do I realise what my true image is? I look in the mirror and, by no means am I thinking "my - how slim you are?". But I don't see someone who looks like those women. So, time for reality to take it a step further. I have decided to take a photo of me in black singlet and boy type black underwear. Oh - and post it. I am going to put it all out there baby and it may just be the push I need.

Posted by Jules :: 10:09 pm :: 5 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------------------------------

Wednesday, February 1

Wednesday Weigh In - Week 3

Week 3 of Paulene's challenge that is.

23rd weighin at weight watchers. Exactly 8 months back on weight watchers:

Start Weight: 109.8kg
Current Weight: 103.5kg
Loss/Gain: +100g
Kgs Lost: 6.3kg
Kgs to Goal: 38.5kg

6.3kg in 8 months. WTF is up with that? I have no commitment!! I have had to put off entering the duathlon, only 5 weeks to go and I have a hideous chest infection. I am actually very close to crying right now. I feel like, no matter what my commitment to this C25K was, life just can't throw me the ball I need to get home. I am seriously upset about this. I was determined. I struggled through that first run and I did it, I was stoked and then I got sick. Every time I blow up the balloon it gets burst on me.

Don't get me wrong, I am completely aware of how much I am self sabotaging my efforts on the food front. But I was amped for this running and I haven't had a cough for over a year and .......

Anyway, I can't really re hash it anymore. It is just sucking me into an abyss of self pity.

By the way, have to say to Anna from Waikato, thank you so much for your lovely comment on my tagboard about the photo. It is refreshing to hear of new lurkers out there.

As for everyone else, what's with only 7 comments in a couple of weeks? Am I boring everyone senseless or have you all just given up on me with my pitiful attempts?

Posted by Jules :: 10:29 pm :: 6 Comments:

Post a Comment

---------------------------------------